DEPRESSION-SIGECAPS

• Sleep? I definitely oscillated between insomnia and hypersomnia.
• Interest? Patients, doctors, the hospital were all becoming commonplace. Throughout medical school, I’d jotted down stories of patients and lessons I’d learned. I thought about the last few months and realized entries had ceased (not because I was busy, but because I was no longer interested in what patients could teach me.)
• Guilt? I was without a role or purpose. I spent months “pretending to be a doctor” without real input on patient care but with constant pressure to perform and make a positive impression. The reality was my presence felt meaningless to patients and staff alike.
• Energy? Gone. Workouts had fallen by the wayside sometime throughout the year. Making it through a shift was all I could ask of myself.
• Concentration? I had always enjoyed studying and research, but it seemed I could not focus on topics that interested me (i.e., anemia) let alone those that didn’t (i.e., electrolyte disorders).
• Appetite? The question which triggered this exercise in self-diagnosis, most definitely gone.
• Psychomotor symptoms? I don’t believe I was manifesting this symptom — of course, I’d always had trouble comprehending exactly what qualifies as psychomotor.
• Suicidal? No, but I wonder, if I was, would people notice?