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STJ QRA
Rephrasing your question- Can I be directly conscious of my consciousness?
What is this ‘I’ that tries to be aware of consciousness?
This ‘I’ is the mind.
The mind needs something psychologically tangible to be aware of consciousness. Abstract awareness is not possible for the mind, because in abstraction, the mind ceases.
Here the mind is conscious of consciousness that is bounced off through senses, memories, and such.
When all these are negated, you are conscious of your consciousness directly and immediately with no psychological intermediaries including ‘you’.
You begin your practice by observing your mind in its dynamism. Initially, it could only be a thought observing other thoughts.
Steady practice will weaken the aggression of thoughts and thought-patterns. Somewhere, there will be glimpses of awareness.
Now, this awareness becomes your identity(so to speak) and your mind becomes an alien.
This awareness observes the mind.
This awareness is the powerful fire that burns your mind, and all the anguish and ego along with it.
naṣta-manasot-kṛṣṭa yoginaḥ
kṛtyam asti kiṃ svasthitiṃ yataḥWhat action remains to be done by that great yogi whose mind has been extinguished, and who rests in his own true and transcendent state of Being?
Verse 15, Upadesha Saaram of Bhagwan Ramana Maharishi, Translation by DM Sastri
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What happens is of little significance compared with the stories we tell ourselves about what happens. RABIH ALAMEDDINE, The Hakawati
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